Last year at this time, I was often depressed. I was about two months into a new job, which had 3 months of training. I thought I was ready to take on new challenges, and since this job was better pay I was excited. Training well prepared me for the job, but I knew it was going to be difficult working with families that did not want me there. But about a month into training a co-worker of mine made the environment even worse. She became hostile, when I tried to address her attitude toward others and training. I felt like I was in the corner of a classroom some days. Adding to that my husband and I had recently welcomed a friend into our home as he is finishing up school and could not find a place. So I often came home crying and had two people look at me like they didn't know what to do because they didn't work with me, and killing with kindness is easier said then done with a hostile person. Why don't we add one more thing to my plate that was happening a year ago? My husband and I decided to go off birth control and were anxious to get results, but after a month of no period and no results, I was drowning farther in sorrow. Took me awhile to share this.
One afternoon driving home from work, I was almost hysterically crying, and Mandisa's song "Stronger" came on the Joy FM. It helped a lot, but looking back at the song again today, a year later, it is so very very true.
I have put more and more faith in God, and have surrounded myself with great people that are encouraging. After I had negative pregnancy test results, I had trained to tell myself that it will happen when God plans it to. The more you say something, the more you believe it to be true. If I had become pregnant right away, my husband would have lost his job to an injury that he would have not received surgery for due to finances and having a baby coming soon. Fortunately I was able to return to a work environment that had positive people and gave me a flexible schedule. So I was able to have free time to join small group and was able to care for my husband after his surgery. We then struggled with finances post surgery and me working part time, but God provided us with a business and a team of people that wanted to continue to help us to grow in Him, and make money. And now I am also being blessed with a full time job, but still have the time to pursue God in small group and attend business meetings for our journey to freedom.
Today I participated in the JoyFM's share-a-thon as a Thank you to God and them for always showing me that there are greater things out there and that next year I will be "Stronger"
No comments:
Post a Comment